Parents may require weeks of intense negotiation to reach an agreement on the terms of their custody order. In some cases, parents can’t settle their disagreements on their own. They litigate and rely on a family law judge to establish reasonable custody arrangements that uphold the best interests of their children.
Once there is a custody order in place, the parents generally have to adjust to shared parenting time and shared decision-making authority. They have to communicate regularly about pending decisions related to their children. They likely also see one another frequently during custody exchanges. Occasionally, parents realize that they may need to change or formally modify their current custody order. The following are some of the warning signs that a modification might be beneficial.
Disagreements about adjustments
When a custody order has become outdated due to a change in family circumstances, the parents may have to regularly discuss ways to adjust their schedule. If the children transfer to a new school or the parents start new jobs, the changes to the household schedule could require regular changes to the parenting schedule.
Every one of those discussions is an opportunity for conflict. Parents may find themselves fighting and scrambling for childcare frequently. Modifying a custody order so that it accurately reflects current family circumstances can help limit co-parenting conflict.
Household dynamics have shifted
Sometimes, modifying a custody order is a smart move because relationships within the family have changed. Puberty, parents starting new relationships after a divorce and a host of other factors could affect the relationship either parent has with their children. In scenarios where the dynamic has become hostile or where one parent’s living arrangements cause stress or distress in the children, it may be time to consider updating the custody order.
Difficulty fulfilling responsibilities
If one parent is consistently late for their time with the children or cancels their parenting time, that can lead to feelings of profound rejection for the children involved. Other times, one parent may have become less stable living on their own. They might abuse drugs or alcohol.
In situations where one parent can’t fulfill their parental responsibilities, the other may want to modify the custody arrangement to better meet the needs of their children. Recognizing when it may be time to ask the courts to update the custody order can help ensure that the children receive the support they deserve.
Modifying a custody order can help parents meet the needs of their children and improve their co-parenting relationship. Parents who pursue formal modifications may find it easier to share their parental responsibilities than those who keep trying to make outdated custody orders work.