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How to reduce the negative effects of divorce on my children

| Jun 7, 2021 | Divorce |

As a Pennsylvania parent going through a divorce, it can be just as difficult for your children as it is for you. From the child’s perspective, their whole life is changing and they don’t understand why. Divorce can have many negative effects on your children, so here are some things you can do to reduce the impact.

Don’t argue in front of them

If you and your partner are going through an ugly divorce, make sure all of your arguments happen behind closed doors. The last thing your child needs at this time is to see their parents getting angry and yelling at each other. They may already feel like their family is breaking up, so yelling and insulting each other in front of them will make them feel even worse.

Don’t share too many details

When you have officially decided to divorce, you should sit your children down and break the news to them. However, when you tell them that you’re getting a divorce, you should not share too many details. For example, if you are getting divorced because your partner was unfaithful, your kids don’t need to know that information.

Another example is if your family law attorney informs you that you will need to pay thousands of dollars in child support, these details don’t need to get shared. That will only confuse them, or even cause them to grow resentful towards one of their parents. Instead, simply let them know that you and your partner will be separating, but that it doesn’t mean that you love them any less and that their parents will always love them, even if they aren’t together anymore.

Don’t make the other parent the bad guy

You should never insult or demean your former spouse in front of your children. If they said something that angered you, find a friend or a family member to vent to instead of your children.

No matter what you do, there’s no way that your kids will be unaffected by your divorce. The most you can do is be there for them and be compassionate and understanding towards their feelings of sadness and frustration.